58. Heading to the Hospital, The Sequel

A snakey path.  Last Saturday, as I reflected on my ideal journey through treacherous waters, I was pondering the pain that was spreading through my abdomen.  I had quickly recovered from my first week in the hospital in March, had come through three cycles of chemotherapy, and was well.  No one would expect how well.  Amazingly well.

But Saturday felt different.  I woke up with nagging suspicion and pain to match.  A call to the consulting nurse sent us for a midday bladder check.  And after the group zoom chat, I called for results.  Negative.  Positive would have been a more welcome word.

With that diagnosis came the traditional sounds of “Manage your pain”.  I can imagine generations of ancestors silently screaming with that directive.  I was trying.  I had never used the narcotics in my collection.  I tried one type, switched to the other at the next time window.  No change, no relief.

I called the consulting nurse line again.  “I don’t know how to manage my pain.”  How many people struggle with this every day of their lives?  I have so much compassion.

This time, there was far more concern.  “Go directly to Urgent Care.”  

I packed.  I packed the bags for a hospital stay, my computer, my journal, cell phone charger, changes of clothes, hairbrush, deodorant.  There was no point in making Kwami and Nyasha dig for what I wanted.  Resignation.  Sigh.

Author: Michele Plumb Stowell

Michele Stowell was a teacher, a hand holder, and encouraging voice. Born an early Gen Xer, she has lived in Western Washington for the duration. Her children, two spectacular genetic daughters and an uncountable number of marvelous scout and school sons and daughters, shine as her biggest impact and her greatest blessing. Just before her 54th birthday, Michele was diagnosed with stage four cancer. Her writing and art work are expressions of the drama and the joy of living earth bound. On October 24, 2021, Michele was released from her physical body, transported to continue her work on other realms.

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