6. Chemo: Round One

It’s like WWWF, because the truth behind the big picture is that there is no real competition.  Everyone is on the same team.  The cancer is on my team.  The chemo is on my team.  We are all working together in the drama that is bringing a new kind of excitement, pleasure, and beauty to the world.

It’s like smack down, WWWF (I had to look up the acronym… not my field of expertise!).  First time on the mat, the competition standing on the other side, the crowd cheering and screaming, waiting for the dramatized excitement, the actors in the ring, ready to play out the big show, risking their bodies for the scene.

Michele Plumb Stowell WWWFIt’s like that, but it’s not.  It’s like WWWF, because the truth behind the big picture is that there is no real competition.  Everyone is on the same team.  The cancer is on my team.  The chemo is on my team.  We are all working together in the drama that is bringing a new kind of excitement, pleasure, and beauty to the world.

My focus is more often on the evolving perfection around me.  The love and caring of family and friends, pouring toward me with such light.  It’s the kind of beauty where you watch it and tears run down your face because it makes your heart want to explode.  There is no way to hold the obviousness of how love is everything.  

The heart is actually exploding.  I think it is.  Like particles spreading out into the universe, like a body can no longer hold the truth, and so the soul is showing itself as bigger, universal rather than individual.  Obvious.  

But there are those competitors on the mat.  They are playing out the drama.  There is a visual risk.  It looks like sweat and pain and winning and losing.  It isn’t.